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How Do You Know When You’re No Longer A Tourist?

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by

Kristi
in

Are You A Jamaican Local?

I was reading another travel blog about how the solo female traveler found herself in church in Rio and she documented how she ended up there, and that she knew she was no longer a tourist as a result. It gave me the idea for this humorous, but true list of signs that you’re no longer a tourist in Jamaica. Signs that you have graduated to the next level of traveler. Here they are in no particular order, and you may come up with your own additions after you read the list.

  • You travel with a carry-on as your only luggage because you have more belongings in Jamaica than you do at home.
  • No one comes to pick you up at the airport anymore because they know you’ll figure it out on your own, and they wouldn’t bother coming to get you anyway, for the price you’re willing to pay.
  • When you can hustle your own free ride with another incoming tourist at the airport, and your drop-off point is on the side of the highway. << True story!  I forgot to tell you guys about that one I think.
  • When YOU are the one picking people up at the airport!  (Still the best feeling in the world)
  • When you are no longer blinded by oncoming high beams – I have yet to master this technique.  I’m still a deer in headlights.
  • You have Jamaican utility bills in your name.
  • When the luster of island men has completely worn off and you wear earbuds while walking in the street so you have an excuse to NOT pay attention to them.
  • When you hiss back and ask them what exactly is their success rate with that method of picking up a female.
  • When you see the cost of a restaurant bill and realize you can actually buy an entire Digicel phone AND get your own number for the same price.
  • When the men just stop trying because they know it’s in their best interest LOL.
  • When a roach runs across your floor and you don’t even jump anymore.
  • When you can sleep in a house that has a rat in the rafters.  <<  This has not happened to me yet, but I know Dyana is laughing.
  • You finally get your first “local rate” at an attraction or admission somewhere.  <<  Proud to say I got it!
  • When a Jamaican sends YOU credit!!

These were just the ones that came to my mind as I was typing.  Let’s keep the list going and add yours in the comment boxes below!

work in the caribbean

Comments

22 responses to “How Do You Know When You’re No Longer A Tourist?”

  1. Dyana Avatar
    Dyana

    I was so totally laughing HARD!!! Saying but wait, when did this happen to her? Then saw my name!!!

    GREAT POST – You hit so many of them for me!!!

    Keep up the great work!!

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      LMAO I knew you’d like the rat one. You are MORE local than me for that one alone LOL!

      Reply
  2. Seveen Avatar
    Seveen

    when you can walk all 7-miles of the beach in negril and no one asks you to buy anything – ’cause they know your cheap ass hasn’t bought anything in the last 5 years

    Reply
  3. Kristi Avatar
    Kristi

    LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL Seveen!! I know what you’re talking about! #DEAD!!!

    Reply
  4. Jamie Avatar
    Jamie

    What about when you are no longer afraid of the 40 leg!? I don’t care if I get to go to Jamaica 100 times…I don’t think I could get used to that thing! I was invited to stay at my boyfriends sisters house during my visit to MoBay soon, and all I could think about was running into that horrific creature!!! I asked her if she has ever seen one in her house, and she just laughed at me. She isnt afraid of them at all. Now, that is a true Jamaican in my book. Even looking at a picture of one gives me the ibby gebbys.

    Reply
  5. Kristi Avatar
    Kristi

    Girl those have nothing to do with being local or not because even the locals are scared shitless of them!!!

    Reply
  6. TinaK Avatar
    TinaK

    Here’s my contribution…lol
    – When going to bed the noises and sounds outside are more of a comfort then a bother such as the loud dancehall music 2 houses away, the honking horns and loud music from the cars, the treefrogs (love that sound), the cows mooing, the crowing rooster (mind you, damn thing can give that up at 4am!), and not to forget, the neighbours calling to one another. I sleep the best in JA no matter what is happening around the yaad!!At home, man it better be quite or there is no way I’m ever going to drop off!!
    – Starting to use terms such as “lock-off” as opposed to turn off
    – and getting used to having no cable (only 2 channels)…doesnt bother me in JA but we got a whole load of channels here

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      OMG Tina LOL!!! I totally agree with your first two. I sleep like a baby with the noise at nights there…as mentioned in my book with my neighbor’s loud music habits. Also using patwah terms unconsciously. I ALWAYS say stuff like “long time mi don’t see you” and then realize I’m talking to a Canadian LOL.

      As for cable, I never bothered hooking it up in my apartment in JA for 9 whole months! And never missed it.

      Reply
  7. Janet Avatar
    Janet

    ….when you leave your camera at home…..but the best one for me is when I arrive at the airport and head straight for the CARICOM line and don’t have to queue up with the rest of the UK passport holders because mine has got a stamp in it saying I don’t have to join that long, slow line ever again!!!!!

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      Suz – I’m with you, I will ALWAYS be afraid of them and flip up my bed sheets at night to make sure none are in my bed.

      Janet – I envy you in the Caricom line!

      Reply
  8. Suz Avatar
    Suz

    Having been BITTEN by a 40 legger, I don’t care how local I would be, I will NEVER not be afraid of them!

    Reply
  9. Vera Avatar
    Vera

    I am new to “JamaicaMyWay” and Im hooked. I dont think i can go half a day without reading a story or wathcing a video or looking at the pics!
    I was in Jamaica for my first time ever this past January and met the most wonderful and amazing locals that now are my dearest of friends and we talk almost daily!!!
    I fell in Love with the country and its people, Jamaica is in my heart!!
    Thanks for all the great posts and the funny comments from all the great people on this site!!
    Respect

    Reply
  10. Kristi Avatar
    Kristi

    Awww that’s so great Vera! Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad you love JA as much as we do!

    Reply
  11. Michaela Avatar
    Michaela

    These are hilarious! I remember the first time I saw a rat crawling on beams above my head. I couldn’t decide if I should run or grab my camera!

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      LOL Michaela! Talk to Dyana about that one. As for grabbing the camera you SOOO sound like me! I could be in the middle of a bank robbery and I’d ask them to wait while I take a picture so I can write about it LMAO!

      Reply
  12. helena Avatar
    helena

    I also love your site ! And Jamaica 🙂 !!! How about the dogs !! When you sleep great while hundreds of dogs are barking and howling during the night ! And when you give up lecturing the locals about not giving the dogs chicken bones and you start giving them everything as you know they are hungry and dog food is soooo expensive.

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      LOL Janet I stumbled across this post again last night and HAD to bring it back up because it makes me laugh like a fool too!

      Helena, thanks for reading and commenting. I think I mentioned the night noises in there too lol.

      Reply
  13. Janet Avatar
    Janet

    It doesn’t matter how many times I read this blog, I still end up laughing til I cry! Having utility bills in my name gives me a buzz especially when I have to collect them from the post office myself….AND also when I’m commandeered to hold the bottle with the rum in the bottom to help catch a forty legs……only a real Jamaican has that privilege!

    Reply
  14. Nadine Avatar
    Nadine

    So true some of these. I wear my headphones for the beach, works most of the time!

    Reply
  15. daalin Avatar
    daalin

    I knew i was no longer a tourist when i could walk around at 3 in the morning and alot of locals remembered me
    And i felt date

    Reply
  16. Tamika Avatar
    Tamika

    I am so glad I came upon this site. I have always been fascinated with Jamaica, the culture and the people. Finally, at 35 yrs old I will be making my first trip to MoBay next month and I am super excited. I already love it and I haven’t even been.
    I am a little scared about the rat thing though :/
    I enjoy reading all of the post, I always log off with a smile on my face.
    THANK YOU

    Reply
    1. Kristi Avatar
      Kristi

      LOOOOL Tamika!!! First of all CONGRATS on your maiden voyage! I hope it’s everything you want it to be! Second – do not let rats scare you lol. I’ve been to Jamaica 20 times and haven’t seen one yet. I’d be more scared of 40 Legs than rats.

      Reply

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